“Let it go. Let it out. Let it all unravel. Let it free
and it can be a path on which to travel.”
Recently we talked about feeling our feelings. Today let’s go a step further. Often we deal with hurts by burying them and stewing for the rest of our lives. That means we feel our feelings in a self-destructive manner. The quote suggests we “Let it go. Let it out.”
Some people think that letting it out means that we scream and yell at the person who hurt, insulted or challenged us. While there are a few occasions that method will work, most times emotional outbursts will make it worse. We can try to discuss the situation quietly and see what happens. If that doesn’t resolve the situation, we have other options for letting it out.
We can journal, talk to a friend, talk with a professional, and feel the feelings until they dissipate. Most situations that upset us to that extent need a combination of those options. We can journal and talk to a trusted friend. If that doesn’t work we may seek professional help. Along the way we need to feel the fear, pain, anger, sadness, abandonment, disappointment or other label that will name the problem.
Actually, naming what we’re feeling is the hardest part. We often tell people we are disappointed or concerned to be diplomatic. Those are appropriate labels when you confront someone or are talking to a supervisor. When you are naming your feelings either to yourself or to an appropriate third party you can, and probably should, use stronger language. You can say whatever you need to say to get the feelings out.
Once the feelings are out in the open, you can begin letting go. In Al-Anon and AA one of the most used phrases is “Let go and let God” meaning that we must let go before God can take it away. Another common phrase is “Anything an Al-Anon lets go of has claw marks all over it,” meaning they hold on until the pain simply slips off the ends of their fingers from its weight.
Do you want to go through life holding on until the pain eventually slides out of your grip? Or would you rather let go before the weight gets too heavy and begin healing before the wounds destroy your body and your mind? Would you prefer to walk a smoother path as the quote says?
My choice, after carrying hurt for many years, was to begin letting it go. What a gift that was. Life is so much easier and lighter, the path smoother without the weight of old pains. That’s not to say I’m perfectly adjusted now, just much better and getting even better yet.
Thank you for teaching us that we don’t have to carry the weight of old and new pains. We can release ourselves from this burden by letting it go. We know that you will transmute the pain to feelings of calm. We know and trust that this is so for each of us, no matter our situation.
And, so it is.
* Unknown author, quoted on December 22, 2015 post at pamela@pamelaharpercom, “Inspiration 12-23-15 “Loving all of you”
© by Sharon D. Dillon, January 4, 2016
Sharon D. Dillon, email@example.com, http://energywriter.me “Laugh your way to peace, love and joy”
Chesapeake Bay Writers, Erma Bombeck Writers Workshop, Southern Humorists, National Society of Newspaper Columnists
Author of “Twins! Oh no!,” one of 14 stories in The Book of Mom: Reflections of Motherhood with Love, Hope and Faith, published by booksyoucantrust.com. Available in print and e-format at Amazon.com.
11 thoughts on “Thoughts to Ponder – January 4, 2016”
Thanks for sharing these words of wisdom! Agree with every single word 😀
Thank you for finding my blog and commenting.
I find that not giving people power over you to do such things is a great preemptive strike. I also examine if that person is important enough in my life to merit that sort of strong emotion–most of the time, the answer is no. What do I care what this or that person, who is not important in my life, cares or thinks? It’s easier to let it slide off if you examine things that way, so that when a boss treats you like crap, it just doesn’t get to you. FWIW.
So true, Carson. Sadly, it took me too many years to figure that out. That’s one reason I write what I do to, hopefully, help others climb out of the pain/fear pit.
FWIW?? I’m not familiar with that acronym.
That was truelly beautiful. Thanks for sharing. That’s why I’ve journalled alot ever since I was little and blog as well. It helps. It all helps even coming on here to read and ponder on journals like this. Massive thanks. Better out than in my mother always used to say. I find singing and dancing at the top of my voice on a weekend morning also helps too.
Thank you, Candy, for your beautiful comments. Good for you for keeping on top of your feelings with the steps you take to be aware. I have to sing and dance in private, because I can’t carry a tune and am awkward dancer.
Such great wisdom and advice, Sharon!
Thank you, Dave. I only write what I need to hear when I do Thoughts to Ponder. BTW, I’m always amazed how fast you respond. It seems like your response is here within seconds after I push the go button.
Nice job. Of course.
Thank you, Dave.